Sunday, December 16, 2007
selfish... why does everything seem to look selfish and is selfish.. i guess i should be more.. to try and stop myself and my insane world from going on.. i must break free.. if it wasn't meant to be it will never be.. came to think that there really is no point pursuing something that will never come back. u get it u get it.. u don't u don't.. nothing comes easy.. even through lots of determination, will, hope, effort it will never come.. because that is how it is..
속일지도 우리가 그러나 말한 무슨과에 관하여 비록 우리가 모르더라도 그 사기는 여전히 아플 것이다
anyways there ain't much to look forward to anyways.. everything will still come to an end.. bitter sadness.. i dun see many better days ahead.. haiz... probably going to see a doctor again on Monday or something.. my misery.. my destiny.. my responsibility..
thinking about it, i start to wonder... have i actually been truthful to myself lately.. i seem to be a different person everyday.. 1 day i'm sharp, 1 day i'm broken, 1 day i'm sour, 1 day i'm sweet, 1 day i'm rebellious, 1 day i'm innocent.. wad am i in the end? just plain misery and rolling over it to feel like i'm above it?
truth really, i hate new things happening.. i hate new things that replace the old that were like golden.. i hate having to feel this way too.. but wads this feeling?
complications and why do i do them?? i dun understand myself, i'm lost, i'm alone, and i'm no one interesting..
theres a word to put for this i suppose.. but i can't think of it... Forsaken? Forgotten? Irritating..
Anyways.. Happy b'day Jake (if u read this)... forgot to leave behind any msges or well wishes... i've been lost in time.. i thought yesterday was Wednesday..
Posted by wJ at 12:59 AM